Jokes You Must Avoid During Casual Talk #4

Posted by Srikanth Srinivasan as All Posts, Bad Grammar, Grammar, Jokes Jokes to be avoided, Jokes You Must Avoid During Casual Talk, Jokes to be avoided, Petty Things, Shabbaaaaa, Sir, joke



I hates people with bad grammar.

      

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Deaf accountant joke

Posted by rbalakrishnan as Reader's Digest, deaf accountant, funny, joke



Hey wassup people.. I came across this joke yesterday, thought i’d share it here (This joke is not original by any means, it has various forms of it all over the internet, but Reader’s Digest still published this and gave 1000 bucks to the guy who sent this in, December 2008 issue)

There was this major mobster/gangster (very short-tempered), who made millions of dollars everyday by indulging in all sorts of major crime. He hired an accountant to take care of his numerous bank accounts in various countries and keep track of all the money-realted stuff. (This guy being a major criminal and all, he was obviously bad at math and stuff, so he had to hire a guy for that).


This accountant guy happened to be deaf, as well as dumb. He could communicate only through sign language thus, but he picked up cash details real fast and was really efficient in the job assigned to him, hence the gangster found no reason to complain.


A couple of months later, the gangster realised (dim-witted as he was), that the accountant had somehow embezzled $5 million in cash from him. Enraged, he stormed off to the accountant’s house and threatened to rape his wife and burn his kids alive if he did not tell where he’s hidden the cash. But then he realised his threats were futile as the accountant could not understand him. Miffed, he arranged for a sign language interpreter to be sent over, and the conversation went something like this::


Gangster: Ask him where he’s hidden the stolen cash.


Interpreter: Repeats the same to the accountant in sign language.


Accountant: I have no idea what you are talking about, I did not steal anything.(in sign language)


Interpreter: Repeats this in English to the gangster.


Gangster: (Enraged) Tell this mothafucka that i’ll rape his wife and burn his kids after having his penis cut off. He holds a gun to the accountant’s temple and almost pulls the trigger.


Interpreter: Explains this threat to the accountant with some difficulty.


Accountant: (really scared by the threat, frantically signals) OK OK!!!!! I’m really sorry please do not shoot me, I stuffed the cash in a green suitcase and buried it in my cousin barny’s garden and marked the spot with an X.


Interpreter (with a grim look on his face, turns to the gangster and says): This guy has some nerve, boss- He calls you a son of a bitch and says you don’t have the guts to pull the trigger, he asks you to go and f**k yourself.

:) :D !!!

      

Popularity: 1%



Jokes You Must Avoid During Casual Talk #2

Posted by Srikanth Srinivasan as All Posts, Jokes Jokes to be avoided, Jokes You Must Avoid During Casual Talk, Jokes to be avoided, Self-proclaimed humour, Shabbaaaaa, Sir, joke



Hey, Have you heard the one about the incomplete joke?




      

Popularity: 3%



LOL :P

Posted by sp2hari as Fun, Uncategorized, college, joke


I was checking out our NITT site after along time. I was actually surprised to find a link saying “Student Conduct and Disciplinary code” in the home page. That too in the Spotlights section. I was very sure this must be some kind of joke. :) And yes, I was so true. :)

Let me list out some of the “Student Conduct and Disciplinary code”.

  • Students are expected to spend their free time in the Library/Reading Room. They shall not loiter along the verandahs or crowd in front of the offices or the Campus roads. Students should refrain from sitting on places such as parapets, stairs, footpaths etc.
  • NITT Campus is a “Smoking free and Alcohol free Campus”. Possession or consumption of narcotic drugs, tobacco, alcohol and other intoxicating substances are strictly prohibited in the Campus and Hostels.
  • Silence shall be maintained in the premises of the Institute.
  • Students are not permitted to use mobile phones in the class room, Library, Computer centre, Examination Halls, etc.
  • Students shall only use the waste bins for dispensing waste materials within the Campus including classrooms, hostels, offices, canteen and messes.

You can read the entire joke book here.

Maybe this is why they say “Rules are meant to be broken”. :P

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